Earth Mama’s Fun Questionaire
1. Where did Earth Mama come from?
A. Earth Mama sprouted among the corn stalks on a farm in Iowa, which may account for her lingering corny humor.
B. She emerged from the womb making music, and mesmerized by the elegant beauty of the Earth at an early age, she began combining them for the purpose of Helping Heal the Planet One Song At a Time.
C. The youngest of five children, she discovered during adolescence that she was the “green sheep” of the family, and has been bleating about the wonders of the natural world, henceforth.
2. How many songs has she created?
A. None. They all came straight from God.
B. About 400
C. Not enough
3. Is Earth Mama famous?
A. Yes, to the few people who know her, and at www.earthmama.org.
B. No, her desire is not to be famous, but to be “Helping Heal the Planet One Song at a Time.”
4. Does Earth Mama really think we can make a difference in our planetary future?
A. In her native I-wegian (Iowa and Norwegian) words, “You betcha!”
B. Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.
C. Oui, ya, da, yuppers, si…
5. Does Earth Mama recycle?
(See choices for #4)
6. How did she get the name Earth Mama?
A. She gained a little weight and was looking pretty round.
B. She likes to wear comfortable, casual clothes made of natural fibers and sometime appears to have stepped right out of the 1970’s.
C. Someone in an organization to which she belonged was poking fun at her for trying to get the group to stop buying and using styrofoam (scourge of the Earth) and called her an “Earth Mama.” She decided to turn it into something useful, went home that night and wrote the song “Earth Mama” and been belting it out to crowds since that day.
7. Is there only ONE Earth Mama?
A. No, but Joyce Johnson Rouse owns the trademark on the name and will take legal action against anyone diluting or infringing upon it. (It’s not nice to fool with Mother Nature.)
B. Yes, the geophysical Earth, third rock from the sun, is really the only Earth Mama. The singing one just makes music and plants seeds of respect for “The Big Earth Mama” on her behalf. (Think “the Johnny Appleseed” of Earth Literacy.)
C. No, there are now little honorary singing and dancing Earth Mamas all over the world. You can be one, too! Ana One, ana two…”Who makes diamonds, who makes gold? Who is wondrous to behold? Who’s a couple billion years old?…Earth Mama!”
8. Does Earth Mama have a police record?
A. Yes, she has served time in the pun-itentary for spontaneous bad wordplays.
B. No, she is an entertainer with conviction, but nobody has nailed her with a conviction, yet.
C. Yes, she bought a Police LP recording about 10 years ago.
9. Is it too late to save the Earth?
A. No, because the Amazon and the Nile know “mouth to mouth resuscitation.” (yuck, yuck, groan, groan)
B. No, we can begin by making spun vegetables (Whirled peas).
C. No, the Earth is not in danger of becoming extinct. The Earth will be here even if we destroy ourselves and all living creatures. It ain’t the Earth that is fragile, ultimately, WE are. (And the cockroaches will survive anything.)
10. Can an “Earthie” (Earth literate, conservation minded, biosphere-respecting person) get elected president?
A. Yes, if they get enough votes.
B. Yes, if we help them get nominated. (I know we can, I know we can.)
C. Yes, if we ”work as if it all depends on us, and pray as if it all depends on God.” (Martin Luther)
D. You betcha!
11. What did Earth Mama do before she became civilized?
Lead a Wildlife!
12. Can you understand the words on the Earth Mama recordings?
A. Only if you know English (or I-wegian)
B. Yes, she had several speech and theatre teachers who taught her to E-NUN-CI-ATE.
C. Even if you are hard of hearing, all recordings include printed lyrics so you won’t miss a thing!
13. Does Earth Mama ever get discouraged?
We’ll ask her when she returns from Electro-Shock Therapy.
14. Who are Earth Mama’s heroes?
a. Julia “Butterfly” Hill
b. Dr. George Washington Carver
c. Johnny Appleseed
d. Edward O. Wilson (biologist who coined the term “biodiversity.”
e. Honey bees
f. Rachel Carson
g. Anyone who advocates endorsing the Earth Charter.
h. Everyone who recycles, reduces, and reuses resources and lives lightly on the Earth!
15. How can I help Earth Mama protect the Earth?
a. Buy Earth Mama CDs for gifts to your friends.
b. Tell your friends about Earth Mama.
c. Become a V VPM (Voluntary Vice-President of Marketing).